Meanderings of Adam and Stacia

Hey everyone!  Been a while since I wrote a new entry for our little blog here... I've been a little busy BEING MARRIED TO MY BEST FRIEND!!!!  Yeah... We've been married for 12 days now... 2 week on Saturday, and I just gotta say... IT'S BEEN TRULY AMAZING!!!  I still sometimes can't believe that we're married... WE'RE MARRIED!!!  Stacia truly is my best friend and now she's MY WIFE!!  That's wild to me, and yet... it's the greatest thing ever!!

So I've been living with Stacia for 12 days now... well, with Stacia AND Joey, my STEP SON!!!  He is awesome.  I will say, he gets up way too early and comes and jumps in bed, which isn't my favorite thing in the world... but we explained that he's got to wait until a little bit later in the morning, and he's been very receptive of that, so that's really nice to get to sleep until... 6:30am... still WAY early for me, but not terrible.  The early morning wake up calls have helped me to sleep better through the night, I think.  So a blessing in disguise.

Anyway, from the title of this post, you can probably assume it's about our honeymoon... WHICH IT IS!!!  We leave TOMORROW MORNING/AFTERNOON for the cruise!  We're going on a 9-night Mexican Riviera cruise... We're going to Cabo, Puerto, Ensenada and Manzanillo.  I really REALLY can't wait!!  We've got a few shore excursions planned, as well.  We're para-sailing in Cabo, we're going on a Pirate Ship Adventure in Puerto Vallarta, then we're getting a couples massage on the ship when we're in the Ensenada port.  It's going to be AMAZING!!!

I'm mostly looking forward to being able to relax, finally... we've been going crazy with the stress of the wedding planning before the wedding, and since the wedding 2 weeks ago, that stress has slowly been falling off, which has been great, but we still haven't had a real chance to relax... so these 9-nights are going to be AMAZINGLY WELL-DESERVED!!!   I've been keeping myself busy finishing up the putting the house together with all the new stuff (my stuff) and all that decorating and cleaning and straightening type stuff while Stacia is working and Joey is at school.  I've also been enjoying how much I've been cooking... which I simply LOVE doing, cooking is actually kind of relaxing for me, so I love doing it and that's a plus because Stacia likes my cooking, so that's great.  I've also been Making Joey's lunches for school, makes me feel like an official dad and I like that.  I've also still been working at the office and slowly getting through some school stuff... so it's been a very busy 2 weeks.

But none of that matters... WE'RE GOING ON OUR HONEYMOON TOMORROW!!!  AREN'T YOU SOOO EXCITED, BABY?!?!?!?!

My friends, it has come down to the wire... WE HAVE ONLY ONE WEEK LEFT!  I still can hardly believe that I'm getting married... but then even more crazy to believe is that I'm getting married in ONE WEEK from today!  It's truly amazing, to say the least.  All the little things that are left are falling into place, and it's really amazing to just watch as everything is just happening for us.

Don't get me wrong, we've put a GREAT DEAL of effort into this whole thing, but we are getting so much wonderful help from so many great friends!  It is genuinely a huge blessing to have so many people willing and ready to help with all these little details of our day next week.  

Tonight is Stacia's bachelorette party with her girls, and I'm so happy that she gets to spend time with friends and family tonight, I know she's going to absolutely love it soo much, so I'm really happy for her that she gets to have a great time.  And while she's doing that with her girls... I'm hanging out with some guys... doing up some bbq, some drinks, some movies, ping pong, and some o fmy favorite musicians jamming... so tonight is going to just be amazing for everyone involved.

So anyway, we have only one week left, and it is going to be the longest week... or perhaps the shortest week.  I just know that it is going to be a very busy one...  we're picking up our marriage license on Monday (the 19th), then I am trying to figure out a night for one final UNmarried date... one last date before we're married... maybe Wednesday or Thursday, either way, it will work out.

I'M GETTING MARRIED IN ONE WEEK!!!

Check out our Wedding Website if you need details.

Adam

So I'm a couple weeks late in posting this update, but not to worry, there hasn't been too much crazy that's gone on since then.

We've sent out all the invitations and received a great deal of RSVPs back already, and we are very excited about that.  It's always fun to come home and see a big stack of those waiting to be entered into the Excel Spreadsheet (that Stacia works on, being that I don't fully understand how to work that program - I'm a words guy, not a numbers and formulas guy).  So that's one thing, and it's awesome.

We've also figured out decorations for the reception AND we're already working on center pieces and a few other special little things here and there... so that's pretty much a really cool deal, we're soo happy that things keep on falling into place so well.

We've already received a few wedding gifts, and we love them soo much.  So to those of you who have already purchased gifts, thank you, they are amazing.

We had a wedding shower with the wedding party and family and close friends.  It was such a fun day... just hanging out, bbqing and enjoying everyone's company, I enjoyed it a great deal.

BIG NEWS!!!  Stacia just the other day bought her first brand new car ever!!!  It is such a nice car.  It's a Hyundai Tucson LIMITED... it's got ALL the bells and whistles... I LOVE IT AND I'M SOO INCREDIBLY HAPPY FOR MY GIRL!!!

Ok... that's about all we've got going on right now.  Keep checking back to see all the new progress and updates, etc.

Love you all.

~Adam & Stacia

PS - Check out the Wedding Website for details about Registry and Map to the church, etc.

I am in the process of planning a wedding with my absolute best friend and fiance, Stacia. In just under 5 months, we are going to be married, which is the greatest blessing my life has ever known. She and I came together in the most unlikely of circumstances, and I wouldn't change a single thing about it, because our story is truly amazing and I love every line of it.

That said... it is safe to say that in all relationships, compromises are met and sacrifices are made for the heath and benefit of the other. I will absolutely acknowledge the compromises and sacrifices that my girl has made for me, and I am eternally grateful to her for each of them. She made them out of love for me and out of a desire to do what is right for us. In the same vein, I've made sacrifices and compromises for her, out of love for her and a desire to do what is right for us.

Now... I used to be a very heavy drinker. Some might even have called me an alcoholic, and I'd probably have agreed with that label. No, my drinking never affected my doing well at work or in school, but it truly and very negatively affected my emotional and mental stability, therefore, while I was still able to function, I was allowing my drinking to tear me down.

Since being with Stacia, I've grown and matured a great deal, and my drinking, as a personal choice of my own, never a request of hers, has become much more limited. Yes, I still enjoy a drink or two or three from time to time, depending on the circumstance, but I in NO WAY drink anything like I used to.

Some confuse my now more matured and more sober persona as a lack of happiness or joy in my life. And while I can understand that perception, I see it as completely the opposite. I am happier now than when I was drinking like I was back then. Was I happy back then, it most likely seemed so from the outside... always loud and part of the crowd, always making jokes and being the "fun" guy to hang out with. Yes, all these things are true, that's how life was for me as a heavy drinker. But I was empty. I was drinking like that to hide the emptiness.

Now... my happiness now is different. Some don't notice my happiness now or appreciate how right now I'm the happiest I've ever been, but truly... that is the case. I finally realized that I don't need alcohol to be a happy man. Like I said, I do still enjoy alcohol here and there, but I understand that I do not need it.

I'm saying, here, that just because my happiness and my joy do not seem like they once did, as loud and on the surface as it used to be (due to the alcohol and lack of inhibitions), my happiness and joy are still there... and much more meaningful and profound.

If you think I'm not the same guy I used to be... that's because I'M NOT. I'm a different man, a better man, a much happier man.

Just ask and you'll see it. Ask me why I love my fiance... look in my eyes as I explain the little things that make me love her... then try and convince yourself I'm not happy... You won't be able to.

Well... now the time has come for another update.  Yeah, it's been a while, about three weeks or so, since I last posted what all was going on, so I'm going to shout out real quick and let you all in on the most recent happenings for us.

Tomorrow, April 23, we are FINALLY getting our engagement pictures taken.  I may have mentioned, but we have scheduled twice before to have our pictures taken for engagement, but both times had to be cancelled, which we completely understood, but which still frustrated us.

So with that said, we're meeting with Jonathan Lavey tomorrow afternoon to enjoy the entire last half of the day shooting pictures in various locations and with various props, and some very special ones that will remain a surprise until a later time.

Yeah, so we are pretty stoked to finally get our pictures done, and we are excited that it gets to be with Jonathan, he's amazing.

I'll let you in on some of the shots at a later time when they are back to us.

~Adam

I was on my way in to the office this morning and something occurred to me.  Sure, I've thought it a few times before, even have written about it before, a poem I believe.  But that's neither here nor there.  The point is that I thought of this once again...

While I was on my way to the office, on the freeway, I noticed so many impatient people.  I was driving a bit over the speed limit, probably hovering right around 76mph or so (I don't like getting up to 80mph anymore, just to be safe).  And yet this speed, which was 10mph over the limit, was not fast enough for several individuals behind me.

I kept on having people get impatient with my already fast paced speed and pass me with such impatient and somewhat angry looks on their faces.  Where are they going that they need to get there an extra 20 seconds sooner?  That's all that going around me would afford them, an extra few seconds.  So after a few of these cars getting impatient and going around me, I just began to think... We go through life much faster than we are meant to.

When we speed from task to task, from point A to point B, we miss so much of what this life has to offer.  We get so caught up in what is going on in our cars, around our cars, on the side of the road, what's in our minds, etc. that we lose sight of the fact that RIGHT NOW is a gift, that's why it's call the PRESENT.  Cliche, yeah, I know.  But I don't care because IT IS TRUE.  We are all taking breaths as we read this, that is a gift.  We are all given the ability to read this with our own eyes... that is a gift.

We need to slow down and admire the world around us.  Even if the view isn't great, even if you're stuck in traffic... slow down your heart and your mind... YOU'VE ALIVE!!  You have been given the greatest gift of all... LIFE!!!

I know about the hustle and bustle of the world around us, I was raised in a family of six kids... I know how busy things can get sometimes.  I know that stress levels mount ALL AROUND US... believe me... I'M PLANNING A WEDDING AS I TYPE THIS... I know that stress is real and that it will ALWAYS hit us here and there... but that's not the point... the point is that IF we take the time to slow down and admire the beauty around us... the stress will feel a little less painful.

When I'm feeling stressed there are a few things I do that help me more than anything I could ever have imagined...

1)  When the stress levels are taking me over and freaking me out, making me feel helpless and hopeless... I close my eyes... I breathe deep, and I acknowledge that this is just a momentary stress, even if the moment lasts a month, two months, it is still JUST A FRACTION compared to the rest of our lives;

2)  I open my eyes back up to the world, and I thank God for the little things.  The fact that my windshield may be cracked, but it hasn't cracked any more in over three months.  The fact that I have a car to get me where I need to go, and that I have a job to pay for that car and all the gas that I need for it; and

3)  I realize that I've never been so blessed in my life as I am right now.  I AM MARRYING MY BEST FRIEND IN LESS THAN A YEAR!!!  One year ago today, I was in a pretty dark place, I was filled with depression and I was spiraling downward... and fast.  But then something happened, I realized that my friend needed a friend, and I went to her.  And from there, from that simple act of comforting someone I cared about... from there grew the greatest love I've ever known and I've never been happier than I am with Stacia Rae.  I would never change anything about her or our relationship.

So take the time to slow down... be a few minutes late... don't rush through the day... you'll miss something for sure.  I'd love to avoid the stress of planning this wedding, but I wouldn't miss ANY of it for the world... I don't want to speed through any of it, I don't want to miss ANY aspect of it.

Here is a little video I put together to illustrate my marriage proposal to my very best friend in all the world, Stacia Rae!!

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Hey friend, family and fans:

With the beginning of this new year, I can see so very much that is going to happen and so much that I have to be excited for.  Some I can share right away, some I can't quite share just yet in that it is not ready to be revealed.

It's January 4, and tomorrow the majority of my family will be flying to South Carolina to see my baby sister, Carla, graduate from Boot Camp and officially become a Marine.  It is crazy what is going on in that kids life.  I think of her as a little kid still, but she's 19 and she is a United States Marine, it's crazy.  So we're flying across the country to see her graduate and share in her pride, so that's cool.

At the end of the month, the bar, The Gypsy Lounge, that I've been a bouncer at for the last 2 years is closing.  This place has been the epicenter of my music experience for the last 6 years.  Some of the greatest music and musicians I've seen in this world have been through this bar, and I've been entirely blessed to get paid for the last 2 years to sit and listen to this music as I check IDs and take money.  So it will be the end of an era, and this place will be missed... I am going to be losing a lot of music, and that is sad.

In May, I should be finishing my stint in graduate school.  If all goes as planned, I'll be walking with my Master's Degree in Literature and Writing in the middle of May... which would be amazing!  I've put so much hard work and a lot of time into this project and the fact that I can see the finish line in view... it's really almost overwhelming!!  I can't believe that it's almost here.

There are a few other things that I'm very excited for this year... but I'll save those for another day... but stay posted, you'll be excited.

Hey guys, it's been a while since I updated my blog, here... but I've got something to share with you!!

If you take a second to visit http://sdtopic.com/issues/3_17_10/features/AdamAlva/adamalva.htm you'll be able to check out the featured article written about me and my book "of silent screams and shattered reflections".

Please check it out and let me know what you think!